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G&B: Apologies to Sting

It's been a blast, folks. The Worlds Most Popular Podcast is signing off. Truth to be told, there's not enough hours in the day for ...

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

texts from last night...

Text Messages from Last Night..

(480): allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed

Labels: (480)
bubble Replies (0)
(618): do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
(317): Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

(310): it was a shit show
(917): We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.

(310): Why did I cab home last night?
(1-310): Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.

(402): Houston.. we have a drinking problem..

(303): I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality

(847): Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.

(716): fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.

(773): Taylor Swift is so right about you.

(978): you're drinking in the law library????
(978): ...not a bad idea....
(508): probably not a good idea either.

(760): can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
(760): oh geez, wrong person.

(703): Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.

(630): I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.

(585): i'm signing you up for texting rehab

(803): So drunk i had to piss sitting down...

(310): I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
(415): Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?

(702): Kareoke will never be a sober sport

(303): I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.

(856): My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?

(904): I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.

(817): She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
(1-817): OMG. What did u say?
(817): I told her I did too.

(802): I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat

(913): i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
(816): i think im in thre room next to you

(805): talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts

(650): Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time