wondering what's next for her.

She never thought she'd make that mistake. Again. Two years ago was her first time. She chose abortion. This time, she'll have it. Two years older. Two years wiser. She doesn't need any man to help her. Strong head, strong will. All she needs to get through. To keep her strong through this whole thing. This whole thing started a few months ago. She broke up with her boyfriend. Looked for an one night stand. She called a pal of hers she met a while back. Thought it would be better than just doing some random from the block. She can't be bothered by her grade 12 chem project or that she's graduating in a few moths. She's having a baby. First step. Tell Him. Even though she knows he most likely won't want to be involved, it's only right. He has to know. She can't even focus on the second step, yet. What is the second step? The third step? Forth. One day at a time, she mutters to herself while holding her teddy bear she got for her tenth birthday even tighter laying down on the living room couch. She picks up the phone. She's calling him. The conversation is going well. He's happy. Bragging about the basketball game he won earlier on in the afternoon and how he's going out with the guys to play pool later. The convo is 15 minutes deep when she pops it out. She tells him she's expecting. It's his. There's no sound on the other end. He gets nervous. She hears him stuttering and kinda trying to form some type of coherent sentence, but he fails. He hangs up. She picks up the phone to call him back, but she realizes that he needs his space now. He'll call back when he's ready to talk. She picks up the phone again and call her mother. No answer. Same with her dad. They haven't spoke in a while. Not since she moved out after grade 11. They didn't talk during the holidays that just passed. She would really appreciate some words from them. Especially now. She's not even four months along and she's already getting the idea of what type of responsibility she has now. As an expecting mother. She realizes she has to step up her game. To get her life on the right track. Even though she's a teenager on paper, she can't no longer act like one. Be one. She has to become an adult and make a good life for the new life that's coming into this world. Hugging the teddy bear. Tighter and tighter. Like she has no one else in this world to count on. She looks at the phone wondering if she needs to call someone else. Anyone? She can't think of anyone. Yet. She walks around the living room. Wondering what to do next. She sits back on the couch. Rubbing her belly she wonders. What's next.