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G&B: Apologies to Sting

It's been a blast, folks. The Worlds Most Popular Podcast is signing off. Truth to be told, there's not enough hours in the day for ...

Thursday, April 30, 2009

one of those weeks..

Said I was going to take a break from here for a while. Couldn't. Had to write. It's amazing how you think you need to stop something, but that something is the only thing that makes it feel better. Well, not the only thing, but the only thing I can do without having a headache in the morning and actually being beneficial to my existence. It's been a tough week. Two deaths. One was like a brother. The other was a brother's brother that I never met. Don't think. Either way, didn't know him well. It's one of those weeks where you think of life. How fast it is. How bad it could be. How good it could be. It's one of those weeks where you think of friends. How long you've known them for. How many true ones you really do have. If you're being the one they expected you to be. If you could do something more for them. If they know how you feel about them. So many other random thoughts. Ideas. Things you should've said. Things you did say but regret. It's a thinking week. The past few days I've been going through the motions. Making calls. Sending e-mails. Receiving e-mails. Making jokes to hold back the tears. Making jokes just to laugh. Doing stuff around the house to keep my mind off things. It's all been a blur. Trying to remember that I know he knew how I felt. We both knew. We both knew that we were the friend we both asked for. I'm happy that we were able to tell each other that. I don't know why we talked about that but we did that night on the phone just a couple months ago. Weird how that happens. It's always like that. One of your last phone calls with someone who dies, something comes up that makes you remember them for the rest of you life. That call made me laugh. We were joking around too much. I think we joked around for so long on the phone the conversation that was supposed to be just 10 minutes ended up being more like an hour and ten minutes. But those are friends for you. Time just zooms by because you're having too much fun. That was his moto. Have Fun. Wise simple words. I also got some good news this week. Real good news. Should be back at school soon. Good shit. Alone time is good. Been having a lot of that lately. Alone time. I've enjoyed it. It's not like I've been depressed. No not depressed or upset, really. Just a bit stressed, maybe and a bit sad too. I'm content that I was ready for it. The Passing. I already went through the mobbing and crying stuff. Now I'm just being strong for everyone else and trying to celebrate a life. A great life. A wonderful life. Have to go to a viewing tomorrow for my friends brother. That'll be tough. Not really good at that kind of stuff. Don't know what to say. What to do. How long should I stay there? What should I wear? It's just one of those times, I guess.