fml

Have you seen this site, yet? Too funny. It's a site where if you're depressed or just not happy, people post some really bad stuff that happened to them which makes you happier. The stuff is funny in that Jack Handy sorta way. Here's a few that made me almost barf up my coffee this morning.

Today, while getting my hair done, I was annoyed that the beautician was not paying attention while straightening my hair. After asking her three times to watch what she was doing, I grabbed the iron and said "let me do it, you're going to burn me!". I then burned two layers of skin off my ear.

Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole.


Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because apparently I need to "grow up". He is the one who plays excessive Call of Duty and still has Pokemon and Bionicles in his room.


Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me, thinking it would be the nice thing to do I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow.

Today, I sent my girlfriend of 4 years a text message saying, 'I love you more than anything.' She then replies, 'Hahah! Was that a fucking joke?' I reply, 'No, why would it be?' She then replied, 'Cause I'm talking to the girl you've been cheating with me on for five months.'